Self Control and Grit

 Takeaway 2- Self Control and Grit

Dr. Angela Duckworth has spent years studying what makes people succeed. Her research has defined two characteristics that predict achievement: self-control and grit. Defined by Duckworth, grit is the perseverance and passion for long-term goals while self-control is the voluntary regulation of impulses in the presence of momentarily gratifying temptations. This involves things like working hard and on the edge of your ability, being able to endure failures, struggles, and frustrations, then finding the determination to try again.

These qualities do not come prepackaged with brand new babies but can be taught. Parents encourage these skills by allowing space for children to make mistakes, learning from their setbacks, and developing challenging yet attainable goals. Here are 3 ways to help your children develop grit and self-control.

1.       Help them find their passion, or at least an engaging activity.

This will help your children stimulate their own intrinsic motivation, which prompts them to act without external rewards. When we enjoy activities simply because we do, we are more likely to develop the intense interest and dedication required to work through the endless days, weeks, months, and years of intentional practice it takes to master a skill. To do this, foster innate talents, encourage new activities, and praise effort.

2.       Teach your child a growth mindset, that mistakes are how we learn.

Setbacks and failures are a natural part of life. As parents, we should strive to remain kind and patient when our children inevitability fail. Be an example of compassionate and positive self-talk, teaching your child to do the same with their mistakes. People with a growth mindset believe they can improve with hard work and practice. Remind your children their brains are like muscles that will get stronger with each repetition. Remember to point out their efforts and use the power of ‘yet’.

   


3. Break down major accomplishments into smaller, attainable goals.

This will help children recognize their progress and know which step they need to take next. The best goals are clear and reachable. Having goals displayed visually will help children maintain a dedicated focus on them. Use the SMART acronym for setting goals:

S- Specific

M- Measurable

A-  Achievable

R- Relevant

T- Timebound

 

Self-Control and Grit will lead to children who can conquer the many challenges of life through hard work, perseverance, and self-confidence.     

 

Reference

Literacy, A. (2021, April 24). Grit & Resilience in children. arcadialiteracy. Retrieved April 1, 2023, from https://www.arcadialiteracy.com/post/grit-resilience-in-children 

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